The Quick Story
I have been wanting to share what has been going on in my life for quite sometime now. However, my life is so darn busy I barley have a moment to think, let alone type it out.
I have been wanting to share what has been going on in my life for quite sometime now. However, my life is so darn busy I barley have a moment to think, let alone type it out.
So here is a quick update.
Dave and I have been trying to have another baby for the last three years. We have been wanting another child for a long time, but the death of James lingered over us. It was hard to push past all of our fears and uncertainties to get to where we are now. In October of 2005 after some heart breaking and life alternating discoveries I had a miscarriage. I did not even know I was pregnant. Dave and I were seeking therapy to put our marriage back together and I was on anti-depressants. This discovery broke my heart, but also awakened me to what I was missing and wanting out of my life.
Dave and I continued therapy and moved to LA. We worked hard on fixing the miscommunication in our marriage, and with the help of a surprising little miracle named Kayla (or niece), realized what we have always wanted was to see the miracle in child birth not the fear and heart break. We turned our energy to moving past the fear. This is when we activley started trying for another baby.
Unfortunately, after becoming pregnant again, and being verbally attacked by outsiders who know nothing of me or my marriage, I had another miscarriage. And then another and another and so on. The road looked bleak, and I grew weak.
Maybe this was all meant to be, but I had lost hope. Everyone around me was having babies and I couldn’t carry to term. I am fortunate to have the two children I have and I thank God everyday that he blessed me with such amazing kids. But I still want another one.
So Dave and I started fertility treatments. It has been along hard road, with no success. I had pretty much given up hope, but not Dave! Dave has been such a rock. He has kept me moving forward and given me the strength to not give up.
So here is the official deal. January 13th I went in for surgery, a Laproscoptomy. They were able to find the problem, and fix it! Yeay! There is hope. It turns out I had stage one endometriosis, which was most likely the cause of my miscarriages. They were able to remove it all. Now it will come back sooner or later, but I have a very high chance of becoming pregnant before then. Once pregnant the hormones with keep the endometriosis at bay.
So we start infertility treatments back up next week, and hopefully I will have good news to share in the next few months.
I just have to say one more thing. I can’t say how much it has meant to me to have Dave by my side. He has not always been the perfect husband, but he has always walked me through the most difficult times of my life. He has gone to all Dr’s appointments, helped with the shots, stayed up all night to ease my fears. He has been so wonderful! I am so lucky to have the chance to have another child with him!
